


Frostiron shorts

by Lookatallmyships



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: "Say hey if you're gay", Coffeeshop AU, Drabbles, FrostIron - Freeform, Kicked out of the apartment due to roommates having sex, Loki gets a pet snake (canon universe), Loki's ticklish, M/M, Paintballing, Tony Stealing the blankets during the night, Tony being afraid of a spider, Tony wont stop texting Loki puns while he's at work, mostly aus, not connected to each other, tony gets turned into a kitten
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-17
Updated: 2016-06-20
Packaged: 2018-06-02 17:26:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 3,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6575323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lookatallmyships/pseuds/Lookatallmyships
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Read the tags. The chapters have the same names as the tags to make it easier.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Coffeeshop au

Tony sighs. Whoever put up the shelves at the coffee store he works at, put them up pretty high, and it's constantly a problem since that's where they keep a lot of their extra stuff.

"Hey Loki?"

"Yes Stark?" the man replies.

"Can you grab a paper cup for me off the shelf? We ran out at the counter."

Loki hands him the cup, and Tony continues on making his customers coffee.

~

"Loki?" Tony asks.

"Yes?"

"Can you grab me another bag of coffee beans?" It's about half an hour before they open, and it's Tony's job to get the first pot of coffee brewing.  
Loki smirks, and hands him the bag. Tony grumbles inwardly. It's not his fault he's short.

~

Tony finishes ringing up the old lady at the counter. He turns towards the pastry case to grab her stuff, to see they're out of paper bags for the pastries. Tony turns towards the shelves, only to find Loki already standing there, stack of paper bage in hand. Tony takes them wordlessly, and get's the ladies stuff together.

~

Tony is just getting into work one morning, when he see's it. Tony walks behind the counter, and is met with a small plastic stepstool covered in heart stickers, with Tony's name sharpied on it. Tony just glares at Loki's smug face, and starts getting ready for the days customers.


	2. Tony stealing the blankets during the night.

Loki wakes up in the middle of the night, shivering. He looks over at Tony, who some how managed to get all the blankets over to his side of the bed during the night, and is fully cocooned in them. Loki tries to pull at the blankets, but they wont budge.

"Anthony" he says calmly.

"Anthony"

"Stark!"

Tony startles awake. In his surprise, he flails and rolls off the side of the bed hitting the floor with a thump, taking the blankets with him. 

"Loki? What? What happened?" Tony asks groggily, trying to disentangle himself.

Loki calmly reaches down and yanks a corner of one of the blankets, rolling Tony over several times as it pulls free. Loki wraps the blanket around himself, and lays back down.

"If you don't stop stealing all of the blankets I am going to smother you in your sleep" Loki says, in a calm, matter of fact way. 

Tony gulps.


	3. Tony being afraid of a spider.

Loki is sitting reading a book, when he hears Tony screech from the other room. Loki sighs and sets his book aside. Last time he didn't go and investigate Tony's screaming, there was a repulsor blast through the wall, and one very very obliterated wasp. Loki walks into their bedroom to find Tony about to throw a shoe at a spider sitting on the wall. Loki rushes over and grabs Tony's arm before he can throw the shoe.

"What are you doing?" 

"I'm trying to kill this spider, what does it look like? Look at it, it's huge!" Tony whines, gesturing wildly at the spider.

"You're afraid of a little spider? Seriously?" Loki asks, and raises an eyebrow.

"Look at that thing. I've never liked spiders, they make my skin crawl" Tony shudders.

"Anthony, you're lucky I don't still have the tarantula I had as a pet in Asgard, when I was younger. I assure you that it was at least ten times bigger then that one. You know, I was thinking of getting a pet" Loki pretends to consider the idea.

Tony pales considerably. "No, no way. I'll get you a dog, or a cat, or a horse. I don't care. No giant spiders. Can I please kill that thing now?"

"What did it ever do to you?" Loki frowns. 

"It invaded my home Loki. This is private property, and it's trespassing."

Loki rolls his eyes. He drags Tony into the kitchen with him, not trusting him to be alone with the arachnid, and grabs a cup. Then he walks back into the bedroom, carefully nudges the spider into the cup, and then covers the top with his hand. Loki walks past Tony, out of the bedroom, and Tony jumps out of the way of Loki and the cup. 

"Remind me why we can't kill it again?" Tony asks.

Loki just shakes his head, and takes it outside.


	4. Kicked out of the apartment due to roommates having sex.

Tony stumbles sleepily down the hallway to his apartment building, lugging his laundry basket along wit him. It's midnight, and he forgot that he has no clean clothes for his early class tomorrow. Luckily the laundry room is open 24 hours. He walks into the laundry room, and is met with a guy, sitting in the corner on his laptop. His name's Loki, Tony's seen him around the building a few times before. He and his brother Thor share one of the apartments a few down from Tony. Loki looks up when Tony walks in. 

"Can't sleep?" Tony asks, curiously.

"My brother is currently loudly having sex with his girlfriend in our apartment. Why they couldn't go back to her place, I don't know. I didn't get an explanation" Loki says.

"Tony laughs. Yeah, that doesn't sound like something I'd want to listen to either." Tony throws his laundry into one of the washers, and sets it running. Well, he's got about thirty minutes to kill, and then this stuff has to go in the dryer. Tony plops down next to Loki. "So. What are you doing." 

Loki sighs. If you must know, I'm playing a game of chess against the computer. There's not much else to do."

"Oh cool. Want to play a game against each other?"

"Sure, why not. Maybe you'll actually be somewhat of a challenge" Loki smirks.

Tony grins. Oh it is on.


	5. Paintballing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one was pretty hard to write for some reason I've never gone paintballing maybe that's why. Tell me if I missed any errors or stuff that doesn't make sense.

Loki and Tony are sitting on the couch, Loki reading and Tony on his tablet, when suddenly Tony breaks the silence.

"So I had an idea" 

Loki looks up in alarm. That is never a good thing to hear coming from Tony's mouth.

"Steve and the others invited us to go paintballing on Saturday. Please come with us?" Tony looks at him hopefully.

Loki raises an eyebrow. "Do I look like the paintballing type to you?" 

"Come on, please? Thor's gonna be there."

"Pointing out that my brother will be present, helps your case how?" 

"You can nail him with paintballs, beat him in front of his friends" Tony points out.

"...fine, but you're buying me coffee after."

Tony grins. "Deal."

~

They wind up with a decent amount of people, decent being: Tony, Loki, Steve, Bruce, Bucky, Thor, Clint, Natasha, Pietro, and Wanda. Everyone had voted, and decided on a free for all, instead of forming teams. Now about, ten minutes in, everyone had basically formed a truce with each other, only excluding Loki. Since Loki had already single handedly taken out Bruce, Wanda, Steve and Pietro, everyone else decided they needed all the help they could get, if there was any hope of stopping him from winning. 

Clint crouches down alongside a barrier next to Tony. "Your boyfriend is scary, dude."

Tony smirks. "You should see him play call of duty."

"Loki plays Call of Duty?" Clint asks incredulously.

"You'd be surprised."

Just then they hear a shot go off, and Bucky stands up from where he was hiding, hands in the air. "I'm out" he says, and walks off to the sidelines.

Tony and Clint look at each other. Tony notices Natasha nearby and waves her over.

"Do we have a plan?" she asks.

"Alright" Tony scopes out the room, before turning back to the others. "Do we know where Thor is?"

"Last I saw he was-"

Thor goes running past a little ways ahead of them, and they watch as he's hit with a barrage of paintballs. 

"And there goes Thor" Natasha rolls her eyes.

Tony claps his hands lightly. "Ok. Umm. I'll sneak around the the perimeter, and try to hit him from behind. You two distract him."

They agree, and Tony starts creeping along the edge of the room.

He hears paintballs being fired, but he's not sure by who. He's almost reached where Loki's been holed up, when he feels a painball hit the back of his head. He whirls around.  
Loki's standing there grinning. Tony drops to the floor, and pretends to shudder violently before dying.

"Get up, Stark. You owe me coffee."


	6. Loki gets a pet snake

Tony is on his way into the living room, when he stops in the doorway. He stands there in surprise for a few moments. "...Loki?"

Loki looks up at him, from his perch on the arm of the couch. "Yes, dear?" he asks innocently.

"What is that?" Tony points at the snake wrapped around Loki's wrist.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Loki says, while stroking the snake.

"You have no idea what I'm talking about?"

"Hmm no, I can't say I do. If you'd care to elaborate, I could try to answer your question." Loki says, with a straight face.

"I don't know. Maybe the huge ass snake in your hands?"

"Stark, this is hardly a large snake. It's a ball python, and an attempt at a peace offering by my brother."

"And Thor thought that a snake was the way to go?" Tony asks, and raises an eyebrow.

"Mmm. Believe it or not, I actually have quite the affinity towards snakes."

"Noooo. I can't imagine that. What gives you that idea?" Tony asks sarcastically.

Loki just smirks, and keeps petting his snake.

"Does it at least have a name?"

"Her name is Artemis. The Greek God Artemis, among other things, is the goddess of the hunt, wild animals, and the wilderness. I thought it fitting."

Tony cautiously comes, and sits down next to Loki, staying a ways away from the snake. "You're not going to let it attack me, right?"

Loki just looks at Tony, with a look conveying the stupidity of that question.

Tony sits next to Loki, watching him with the snake for a minute, before he smiles widely. "Want to scare Clint with the snake?"

"Barton is afraid of snakes?" Loki asks.

Tony nods in agreement. "Big time."

Loki hums. "I still haven't forgotten that day he plastered pictures of reindeer, all over my bedroom."

Tony grins.

~

Clint walks into his bedroom, and flops down on the bed. "Oh god I'm tired." he groans. He closes his eyes, and lays there for a couple minutes, before he feels a weird sensation on his bare arm. His brows furrow, and after a moment he opens his eyes, and turns his head in the direction of the feeling. There is a snake in his bed, which is currently crawling up his arm. Clint yelps, and jumps up off the bed. He flings the door open, and starts quickly striding down the hallway. "STARK! THERE IS A FUCKING SNAKE IN MY BED! WHY THE FUCK IS THERE-" Clint turns to look behind him, and stops mid sentence when he sees the snake slithering down the hallway after him, albeit at a much slower pace. Clint starts running, a constant string of babbling coming from his mouth. "No nope no. No fucking way. I'm not doing this. Fuck that. Fuck you. Fuck the snake. Don't fuck the snake. Figuratively fuck the snake."

Clint comes across Steve, who tries to stop him by resting a hand on Clint's shoulder.

"What's going on?" he asks confusedly.

Clint pulls free, and keeps going. "Tell Stark I'm not coming back until he fixes this!" Clint calls over his shoulder, heading towards the elevator. "I'll be sparring with Nat!"

Steve just watches him go, more confused then before.

~

Tony and Loki sit in front of the computer, watching everything go down via the security cameras. Loki's snickering, and Tony is outright laughing, clutching his sides. Loki holds his hands out, and summons the snake back into them. 

"Do you think he'll come back?" Loki asks.

"He'll probably hole himself up in the gym and camp out there until he hears the snake has been captured." Tony grins. 

The snake disappears from Loki's hands once more, and they both listen as a high pitched shriek comes from the computers speakers.


	7. Tony wont stop texting Loki puns while he's at work.

Loki's doing a shift at the bookstore he works at, when his phone buzzes. He stops shelving books, and pulls his phone out of his pocket.

_From Tony: I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction._

Loki groans and puts his phone away again, before going back to shelving books.

~

He's showing a customer where the science fiction section is, when his phone buzzes again. He makes sure she's in the right area and doesn't need any more help, before excusing himself. Once he's back to the front counter, he checks his phone.

_From Tony: I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down._

Loki sends a message back this time. Like I haven't heard that one before.

~

His boss Natasha asks him to work the register so she takes her lunch break a little early, and he agrees. He's busy ringing up one of their regulars, a girl named Darcy, when his phone buzzes from it's place face down on the counter where he left it.

When he doesn't pick it up, Darcy smiles at him and waves towards the phone. "If you want to get that, I don't mind."

He continues ringing her books up. "Honestly I'd rather not."

She shrugs and thanks him, before collecting her books and leaving.

Reluctantly, Loki unlocks his phone.

_From Tony: A book just fell on my head. I've only got myshelf to blame._

Loki sighs. He texts back: Another book pun, how clever. I work at a bookstore, ha.

_From Tony: Puns about books? I'm drawing a blank! (page)_

Loki: I'm in physical pain right now.

~

Loki and Natasha are in the middle of a conversation, during a lull in customers, when Loki's phone buzzes. Loki puts his head down on the counter and exhales loudly.

"Who's that?"

"Tony" Loki answers simply.

"Ah" Natasha says in understanding. She has met him a few times in the past, and while he's a great guy, people tend to get on her nerves pretty easily. "What does he want?"

"To annoy me to death" Loki mumbles.

Nat snickers.

"Can you read it to me?" 

Nat grabs his phone, and checks the message. "Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read" she reads out loud.

"He wont stop" Loki moans.

The phone buzzes again. 

Loki and Nat share a look before she reads the new message. "Why did the Romanian stop reading for the night? To give his Bucharest" She laughs. "That one's not so bad."

"I think I'm going to throw up" Loki groans.

"Oh stop being so dramatic. They're just puns."

He looks her dead in the eyes, with a perfectly straight face. "Exactly."

The phone buzzes in her hand one last time. "Why does the ghost always need more books? He goes through them too quickly."

Loki throws his hands up. "Ok. My shift ended five minutes ago, I'll be over there in one of the beanbag chairs. You can keep my phone." Loki walks off.

Natasha snickers, and sticks his phone on a shelf under the counter.

~

Tony shows up to pick Loki up a few minutes later, and he walks up to the counter. "Hey Nat, have you seen Loki?"

"Stark. I think you broke him" she smirks.

Tony raises an eyebrow, and she waves him in the direction Loki had stalked off to. Tony thanks her, and goes off to find Loki. He finds him curled up in a green bean bag chair.

"Hey Loks. Ready to go home?"

"No more puns."

"Aww come one. They were funn-"

"No."

 


	8. Tony gets turned into a kitten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Instagram updated again. *sigh*

Loki stares at Steve and Clint in disbelief. Apparently they had drawn the short straws, and therefore were the ones forced to tell Loki the news.

"So what you are trying to tell me. Is that you idiots, Stark included in that statement. Somehow managed to get Stark turned into a kitten?" He looks down at the ball of fur cupped in the captains hands. He would have thought they were joking if he couldn't use his magic to sense that the kitten is indeed Tony.

"Woah woah" Clint pipes up. "It's not out fault. Doom is the one who was firing magic around all willie nillie. Tony just wasn't smart enough to get out of the way."

Loki sighs. He knew he should have gone with them. He had assumed they could handle Doctor Doom and his pathetic army of robots, but evidently he was mistaken. "And you expect me to fix him?"

Clint nods, and Tony meows seemingly in agreement. Apparently by some unspoken agreement, Clint was to take the lead. Steve just stood behind him, trying to keep Tony from wriggling out of his grasp. "Well, he is your boyfriend" Clint says, and shrugs. 

Loki sighs. "Alright, give me a moment to figure out what type of spell did this" Loki starts 'examining' Tony with his magic. Loki hums.

"What? Can you help, or not?" Clint asks in annoyance.

"Do you think it's reversible?" Steve asks, smiling apologetically before turning to glare at Clint.

"Doom isn't particularly skilled at magic, this is in no way permanent. It will wear off in time on it's own, but I can't reverse it myself. Trying to forcibly change him back would likely only do damage" Loki explains. "I'd say it should last for about a week."

Steve scrubs a hand over his face. "Great. We'll have to come up with some reason for the papers, as to why he wont be showing up with the rest of us for the next week. There's bound to be something that will require The Avengers attention."

~

Loki isn't exactly sure how, but somehow he gets saddled with Tony Kitten Babysitting **TM**. A few minutes after his explanation was finished, Steve handed over Tony, and then they both left. 

Loki looks down at Tony. "I hope you're happy with yourself. You know, I could just stick you in a large cage with some food and water for a week. Maybe just leave you in there for a little while after you turn back."

Tony just purrs, and rubs his head against Loki's chin.

~

Loki's sitting on the couch reading a book, resolutely ignoring Tony. 

Tony meows from his place on the floor.

Loki continues reading.

Tony meows again a bit louder, and when he still gets no response, he starts climbing up Loki's pant leg.

Loki simply reaches over and picks a pillow up, before dropping it onto Tony, causing him to flop back down onto the carpet.

Tony meows, somehow still managing to sound indignant in feline form.

Loki just smirks. "Don't you have something better you could be doing?" 

Tony huffs, and stalks off.

~

Loki's laying down in bed, when he notices Tony come walking in. For the past few hours he had been watching a movie in the living room with the others. If Loki's being honest, it's hilarious watching a kitten sit on the couch, staring avidly at the tv.

Tony meows from the floor next to Loki's head.

"Did you need something?"

Tony sits down, and stares up at him.

"Could you possibly be stuck?"

Tony growls.  
"You know, it's quite sad. You were already fairly short, but now you're even tinier."

Tony turns around, and starts heading back towards the door. 

Loki laughs. "I'm just kidding, get back here" he picks Tony up, and sets him on the bed. "It's only four more days" Loki tells him, trying not to snicker.

Tony lets out a pitiful mew.

 

 


	9. "Say hey if you're gay"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I...idk dude.

Tony flops down on the couch. "Alright, what are we watching first?"

Every Thursday night is movie night. They rotate which persons house/apartment it's held at, and this week it's Thor's place. There's eight of them in total: Tony, Thor, Clint, Bruce, Nat, Steve, Pietro, and Wanda.

"Well you know my vote" Clint begins, before Tony interrupts him. 

"No one wants to watch The Princess Bride again."

"Well, you asked" Clint shrugs.

"Anyone else have an idea?" Tony looks around. Everyone is curled up either on the couch, or on the floor in front of it.

They take a vote, and end up watching The Matrix, since Pietro's never seen it. 

They're in the middle of their second movie, Disney's Up, (Tony voted against it, but the room was not in his favor. That movie is _sad_ man) when Thor's brother Loki comes walking down from upstairs. Unfortunately the bottom of the stairs are in the living room, because Loki is wearing nothing but a pair of Batman boxers, and a tank top that says "Say hey if you're gay" in rainbow lettering.

"Thor, could you turn that down? I need to study for-" he stops when he reaches the bottom, and realizes that Thor's not alone.

Oblivious to any awkwardness, Thor apologizes, and grabs the remote. 

Tony grins and winks at Loki. "Hey, reindeer games."

Everyone turns to look at him, and Loki raises an eyebrow at them, until they turn back around. Loki smirks at Tony, before turning around and going back upstairs.

Clint leans in to whisper to Tony. "Dude, don't go there. Thor will kill you."

"You know, I'm willing to take that risk. Besides, Thor loves me" Tony whispers back.

Clint shakes his head. "What kind of flowers would you like for your coffin?"

Tony considers for a moment. "Lilies."


	10. Loki is ticklish

Tv remote in hand, Loki looks up at the sound of the apartment door being opened, and watches Tony come striding through. Tony shuts the door, and looks at Loki with a smug look on his face.

 

Loki looks at him warily. That look does not bode well.

 

“So I just got back from movie night with the guys” Tony begins.

 

“I am aware. Welcome back.”

 

“And while everyone else ran out to get us more snacks, it was just me and Thor for a little while.”

 

Loki raises one eyebrow wondering where this is going. “I'm glad you survived being alone in Thor's company.”

 

Smirk still on his face, Tony continues. “And we got talking about you, and Thor happened to let something slip.”

 

Loki makes sure to keep his features schooled to show indifference, but on the inside he groans loudly. What the hell had Thor done now? If this was anywhere near as bad as Thor drinking one to many and breaking out Loki's naked baby pictures during his eighteenth birthday party, Loki was going to kill him.

 

“Hmm, did he now?”

 

“Yup” Tony pops the p annoyingly.

 

Bastard was enjoying this. Tony slowly walks closer to the couch, and Loki carefully sets the remote down on the coffee table.

 

“Apparently you're ticklish, and decided not to tell me.”

 

Loki tenses, ready to run, but before he gets the chance Tony dives on him. Tony starts tickling Loki mercilessly, and Loki writhes on the couch. He flops over trying to get away, and Tony follows, moving to straddle him.

 

“S-stark!” Loki breaks off laughing uncontrollably. “I swear to god- if you don't get off of me” he gasps out in between giggles.

 

Tony hums, clearly enjoying this. “Now why would I do that?”

 

Loki keeps laughing, struggling to buck Tony off of him. “Tony I- I'm warning you.”

 

When Tony still doesn't stop, Loki gets one hand free from between them, and socks Tony in the stomach.

 

“Oof!” Tony lets out a rush of air, and in his surprise, topples sideways off the couch.

 

Loki takes a few deep breaths as Tony groans in pain. Loki sits up, and looks down at Tony lying on the floor.

 

“Oops” he says with heavy sarcasm. “My bad.”

 

Tony just groans in response.

 

Loki smirks. “Well. I guess you wont be doing that again. Do give Thor my regards next time you see him.”


End file.
